Recently, I turned 30 and began reflecting on the past decade of my life. Sometimes it feels like a lifetime, and other times it feels like yesterday that I packed my bags and moved out of my parents’ home into a completely new country.
I never went to university, I don’t have kids, and I haven’t climbed a career ladder. But what I have done is explore the world, uncover parts of myself I didn’t know existed, and chase what truly makes me feel alive.
I moved to a foreign country at 19, spent a year solo in Australia, backpacked through Vietnam on my own, returned to Amsterdam, traveled constantly, danced at countless festivals, took a year off work just to wander, and lived on a rural farm in Australia. And along the way, I discovered love, yoga, and my passion for wellness and self-growth. Each experience has shaped me in ways I deeply appreciate.
How Travel Became My Escape and Teacher
What most people don’t know about my travels is that it all started as an escape. Losing someone I loved at an early age left me with grief I didn’t know how to handle. I didn’t know how to face those feelings, so the only thing I knew to do was run. Travel became my escape, a way to feel alive again, to breathe, and to forget, even if just for a little while.
Amsterdam was where that escape turned into something magical. I had some of the best years of my life there, late-night parties, endless festivals, and friendships that still feel like family today. I discovered independence, joy, and a sense of freedom I hadn’t known before. Travel wasn’t just a distraction, it was teaching me about myself in ways I didn’t even realize at the time.
After Amsterdam, I decided to go to Australia for the first time. My sister was there, which felt comforting, and we have some wonderful memories together. But the grief and inner struggles I had been running from started surfacing, which I didn’t realize at the time. I acted out my feelings in ways that weren’t healthy. I didn’t feel fully like myself, and I had the urge to run again… back to Amsterdam, where it felt safe.
Before returning to Amsterdam, I spent two incredible weeks in New Zealand with my best friends from Amsterdam. Those weeks reminded me of the joy of connection, laughter, and shared adventure. After that, I decided to go on a solo backpacking trip in Vietnam for a month. That was an experience that would become one of the most transformative trips of my life.
Finding Confidence and Healing Through Solo Travel
Vietnam was different. Completely on my own, I had no safety net, no familiar faces. Just me, a backpack, and a world I hadn’t yet discovered. At first, it was intimidating, but I decided to give it a go. I bought a ticket to North Vietnam for a month, and after that, a ticket home from South Vietnam. Everything else, I promised myself I’d go with the flow and see where life would take me.
As I stayed only in hostels, I met incredible people from all over the world. Every night there was something fun to do, and I loved how some of the friends I met in Hanoi I ran into again in Ho Chi Minh. At the same time, I had the freedom to make my own decisions, go home whenever I wanted, join someone for dinner, or do my own thing. That freedom was liberating.
Slowly, I realized that being alone didn’t mean being lonely. I had space to listen to myself, to make choices for myself, and to face challenges I would have otherwise avoided. Traveling solo taught me more about who I am than I could have imagined. I discovered resilience I didn’t know I had, confidence in my own judgment, and a joy in my own company.
Each bus ride, street corner, and small adventure became a lesson in trust. Trust in myself, my instincts, and my ability to navigate the unknown. That month in Vietnam was transformative. For the first time, I felt the deep satisfaction of standing on my own, fully responsible for my experiences, yet completely capable of handling them.
Returning Home and Facing Myself
After many years and different countries, I felt a pull back to Estonia. The feelings that I was escaping from piled up and showed up as anxiety. Anxiety became so big that it made me realize that no amount of travel could replace inner work.
I moved back home to my parents, took a year off from working, and that’s when I found guidance in Osho books. I started learning new patterns, new mindset shifts, and tools on how to heal.
One thing is sure that when you really want to heal, it takes time!! There is no quick way around it, but one thing is sure that when you do have the right tools and you are willing to put in work, then every day you get better and you start feeling lighter. The way there is not easy, but it’s so worth it.
Two years later, I met my now boyfriend, and for the first time, I experienced a healthy relationship where I felt heard and loved. Together, we moved to a farm in Australia for 1.5 years. It was incredible, but also isolating for a social person like me. The solitude forced me to dive into personal growth, yoga, and wellness, helping me reconnect with myself.
Australia and Bali: Isolation, Growth, and Finding My Passion
Australia was an incredible experience, especially now that I’m looking back. We had some awesome adventures, incredible experiences, but also some very tough times being so isolated as such a social being as I am.
During the high season, Indrek was working A LOT, and I was alone most of the time. This brought up feelings that hadn’t surfaced before, and I realized that even though I thought I had grown over the years, there were still parts of myself I hadn’t fully healed.
The biggest lesson I learned during that time was how much I still hadn’t truly felt my feelings. When I was sad, my instinct was to run or distract myself. Like going out with friends, doing something fun, basically anything to avoid sitting with the sadness.
It was a challenging time, but also a turning point in my life. I dove into personal growth, yoga, and wellness practices, seeking ways to reconnect with myself and find grounding. Those months taught me lessons I couldn’t have learned anywhere else. I will forever be grateful for that time, because it ultimately led me to Bali, where I completed my yoga teacher training and discovered my true passion: writing, bringing people together, spreading positivity, and fully enjoying life. I’m still on this journey, but now I see why everything I’ve been through was necessary. Each challenge taught me resilience, independence, and self-love. Life hasn’t always been easy, but I’ve chosen to focus on its beauty and lessons.
Even when it feels like something is missing, I remind myself that we are the creators of our own stories. Every morning, we can decide how we want to feel. I’ve decided I want to feel good, and I want to inspire others to do the same. Because no matter how hard life gets, there is always beauty to notice, moments to be grateful for, and reasons to feel alive.
Lessons Travel Can Teach You
Step outside your comfort zone.
Travel forces you to adapt, try new things, and discover strengths you didn’t know you had.
Embrace solitude.
Being alone isn’t loneliness—it’s a chance to reconnect with yourself and reflect.
Notice small moments.
Sunsets, markets, local music, or quiet streets help you stay present.
Learn from challenges.
Difficult moments teach resilience and self-awareness.
Reflect daily.
Journaling, mindful walks, or quiet reflection help integrate lessons from travel into your everyday life.
Travel intentionally.
Ask yourself, “What do I want to discover about myself on this trip?”
Celebrate growth.
Recognize how far you’ve come and savor small victories along the way.
A Gentle Invitation for You
Travel is more than visiting new places, it’s an invitation to meet yourself.
The next time you go somewhere new, slow down. Observe. Reflect. Step outside your comfort zone. Notice what excites you, challenges you, or brings peace.
Where could your next adventure take you both outward and inward? 💛
