Anxiety is something we hear about way too often these days. It’s affecting more people than we realize.

And the worst part? It drains the joy out of life. It makes even the simplest things, like answering a text, making a phone call, or just sitting alone with your thoughts unbearable.

I struggled with anxiety for years. It got so bad that I was anxious to talk to my best friend. And that was my wake-up call. I knew I couldn’t live like this anymore, and that was the moment I decided to dedicate all my energy to healing myself.

I started researching anxiety, trying to understand what was actually happening in my mind.

What I learned was eye-opening.

Anxiety is a pattern of fear-based thoughts that keep repeating in our minds. It’s the constant “what if?”. What if something bad happens, what if I fail, what if I embarrass myself? Our brain keeps us stuck in this loop, making us feel like danger is everywhere, even when it isn’t.

But here’s what got me thinking.

If anxiety is created by our thoughts, then that means we have the power to change it. And if we can learn to control our thoughts, we can learn to control our anxiety. That realization led me to meditation and I decided to make it a daily practice.

Meditation isn’t just about sitting in silence, it’s about becoming aware of our thoughts. It helped me break free from endless worrying and overthinking. Instead of letting my thoughts control me, I learned to slow them down and observe them.

And that’s when everything started to change for the better.

 

How I Overcame Anxiety Without Medication – My Personal Story

 

I was born in 1995, and when I was a teenager and in my early 20s, nobody really talked about anxiety. I didn’t even know what it was. I grew up in a pretty happy family, always surrounded by people, and I was very social.

When I was 19, I moved abroad and had the time of my life—traveling, meeting new people, and, of course, partying. Life felt exciting, and I had no idea that anxiety would ever be something I’d struggle with.

But in 2018, everything changed.

I was in New Zealand with a group of my best friends, having an amazing time. Out of nowhere, I felt completely disconnected from myself. My chest tightened, I couldn’t breathe properly, and I started sweating. I was convinced I was having some kind of allergic reaction, so I rushed to the pharmacy for allergy tablets.

The next day, I felt fine, and since New Zealand is full of nature I wasn’t used to, I assumed it was just allergies.

Fast forward three weeks, and I was in Vietnam, traveling from one city to another by plane. And then it happened again—but this time, in the air. I hadn’t eaten anything new, only drank water, so I knew it couldn’t be an allergy.

When I landed in Hue, I went straight to the hospital. They ran tests, found that my blood pressure was high, and kept me overnight. By morning, my blood pressure was normal again, and the doctors were confused. They gave me antibiotics and vitamins, and I finished my trip without any other issues.

When I got back home to Estonia, I went to see my doctor right away. She asked me a bunch of questions, and after just 15 minutes, she confidently told me I had experienced panic attacks.

And suddenly, everything clicked.

At the time, I didn’t fully understand what this meant. I thought it was just a random two-time thing. I had already made plans to move back to Amsterdam and go back to my old job as a bartender.

What I didn’t know was that I was about to step into the absolute worst environment for my anxiety. I wasn’t aware back then that certain things fuel anxiety—like alcohol, caffeine, poor sleep, stress, social pressure, and overstimulation. And working in a busy nightlife scene meant I was constantly exposed to every single one of those triggers.

My anxiety got worse. It became impossible to ignore. I remember one night at the club, suddenly feeling like the world was spinning. My body broke out in sweat, and I felt like I was about to collapse. I ran to a quiet spot in the bar, trying to calm myself down. That night, I realized I couldn’t keep living like this. I asked my manager to switch me to day shifts, which helped a little, but it didn’t fix the problem.

Some days, my anxiety got so bad that I didn’t even remember if I had biked to work or taken the tram. My mind was completely consumed with just trying to get through the day. I knew something had to change, and the best decision I could make was to move back home to my parents—to slow down and really take this seriously.

That was the moment my healing journey began.

When I got back home, I went to see my doctor straight away. I’m super lucky that she believes in holistic remedies first. She listened, asked questions, and reassured me that anxiety is something I can work through.

Now, don’t get me wrong—the medical industry has done incredible things, and for some people, medication is necessary. But research has shown that anxiety medication often doesn’t fix the root cause, it simply numbs the symptoms, like putting a Band-Aid over a deeper wound. And deep down, I didn’t want to rely on something that would only mask my anxiety, I wanted to heal it.

That’s why I was determined to take a holistic approach. I threw myself into self-help books, and there was one thing they all mentioned – meditation.

So, I tried.

But to be honest? I had no idea what I was doing. Was I doing it right? Was it supposed to feel like this? How long until I felt better?

I definitely didn’t see any improvements at first, so I started searching for other natural remedies. I tried valerian root and all the relaxation supplements I could find at the pharmacy. I drank CBD oil, experimented with breathing exercises, and kept trying to meditate.

And yet, nothing really seemed to work. Some days were better, some days were worse. Even though I was no longer working in the bar and had left that high-stress environment, I still hadn’t made any real changes to my lifestyle. I didn’t party as much, but I was still traveling, staying up late, and living in a way that didn’t support my healing. I thought I could cure my anxiety without sacrificing anything. I wanted to heal and still live my life the way I always had.

But I was wrong. To truly heal, you have to choose long-term peace over short-term pleasure. That meant saying no to nights out and yes to rest. It meant skipping alcohol, even when I wanted a drink. It meant learning to slow down, even when my mind wanted to rush.

I knew all of this in theory, but knowing and doing are two very different things. And for a long time, I was stuck in that gap between knowledge and action.

Then—COVID hit.

At this point, I had already transitioned to an office job. One of my friends added me to a WhatsApp group for a 21-day meditation challenge.

Not to be dramatic, but this changed my life.

They say it takes 21 days to form a habit, and I remember so clearly that around the third week, something shifted. My mind felt clearer. I felt calmer. I was sleeping better. I wasn’t as reactive to my emotions. For the first time in a long time, I started to feel like myself again.

That’s when I made a promise to myself – no matter what, I would always make time for meditation. Even just 10–15 minutes a day to sit in silence, to be with my thoughts, to slow down.

And I kept that promise. To this day, my journey with meditation is ongoing. I keep learning, keep practicing, keep growing. And the more I invest in my inner peace, the more my entire life starts to align.

That’s why I’m so passionate about this. Because when you start feeling good inside, everything outside starts to improve too.

I also want to be completely honest—this is not a quick fix. But if you put in the effort, if you truly commit to healing, you will fix the root problem.

 

The Science Behind Anxiety & Meditation

 

For the longest time, I thought anxiety was just something I had, something random that happened to me. But the more I learned, the more I realized that anxiety isn’t just some mysterious feeling.

It’s actually a biological response happening inside the brain. And when I understood why my body was reacting this way, it became easier to work with it rather than feel like a victim of it.

Here’s what happens when you feel anxious and I try to explain it as easily as possible:

Anxiety is triggered by the amygdala, the part of your brain responsible for detecting threats. When it senses any kind of danger—whether it’s a real life-or-death situation or just a stressful email, it sends a signal to your nervous system, activating the fight-or-flight response.

Your heart rate speeds up, your breathing gets shallow, and your body gets flooded with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline—all preparing you to either fight the danger or run from it.

But here’s the thing: your brain doesn’t actually know the difference between a real threat (like a bear chasing you) and a perceived threat (like an awkward conversation or an overwhelming to-do list).

It just reacts. And if you’re constantly stressed, overthinking, and in survival mode, your brain stays stuck in that loop—always on high alert, always ready for danger that isn’t actually there. That’s why anxiety feels never-ending.

Now, here’s where meditation comes in.

When you meditate, you’re training your prefrontal cortex—the part of your brain responsible for logic, reasoning, and emotional regulation—to take back control.

Studies have shown that mindfulness meditation actually shrinks the amygdala (the fear center) and strengthens the prefrontal cortex, making it easier to stop anxiety before it spirals. But meditation doesn’t just change the brain—it also calms the nervous system. When you take slow, deep breaths and focus on the present moment, you activate the parasympathetic nervous system—also known as the “rest and digest” system. This is the opposite of fight-or-flight. Instead of stress hormones flooding your body, your brain releases GABA and serotonin—chemicals that promote relaxation and a sense of safety.

This is why meditation works. It’s not about forcing your thoughts to stop (spoiler: that’s impossible). It’s about learning how to observe your thoughts without reacting to them. Instead of getting caught in an anxiety spiral, you train your mind to step back, slow down, and respond with clarity rather than fear.

And the best part? The more you practice, the stronger these brain changes become. Just like going to the gym builds muscle, meditation trains your brain to be more resilient. It literally rewires your mind to handle stress in a completely different way.

At first, I was skeptical. I didn’t think sitting in silence for a few minutes a day could actually do anything. But after sticking with it, I started noticing the shifts—how I reacted to stress, how much clearer my mind felt, how I wasn’t constantly in fight-or-flight mode anymore.

And that’s when I knew, this isn’t just some “woo-woo” practice. This is science. And it changed everything for me.

 

The Best Meditation to Start With When You’re New to This

 

I hear it way too often— “I don’t know how to meditate.” “I can’t have 0 thoughts.” And then people just give up.

Let me tell you something.

Meditation is NOT about having 0 thoughts. It’s about learning how to sit with your thoughts and not let them control you.

Sure, there are types of meditation where the goal is to quiet the mind completely, but that’s just one style. There are so many ways to meditate, and I promise you—there’s one that will work for you.

But let’s not overcomplicate it.

The easiest way to start meditating is with guided meditations. You don’t have to sit in silence trying to figure it out on your own. Just press play, put your headphones in, close your eyes, and let someone guide you through the process. There are millions of free guided meditations on YouTube and great apps like Headspace and Calm.

I started with Boho Beautiful meditations, and I’ll link one of my favorites here.

In guided meditations, you’ll often be given a mantra to repeat. And trust me, your mind will wander. You will start thinking about what to have for dinner, or that embarrassing thing you said five years ago. That’s normal. Even people who have meditated for years still have wandering thoughts.

The key is to notice when your mind drifts away, and gently bring it back. That’s how you build mental resilience. If you don’t have a mantra, here’s another simple technique I love:

The “Thoughts as Clouds” Visualization:

Whenever a thought pops up—let’s say, “What should I wear tomorrow?”, instead of following that thought down a rabbit hole, just notice it. Imagine turning it into a cloud and watching it drift away. Then, when another thought comes? Do the same thing. Acknowledge it. Let it pass.

This practice hugely helped me. When I feel anxiety creeping in, instead of letting it take over, I just notice it and remind myself, “This is just my brain sending a false alarm.” Then, I turn the anxiety into a cloud and let it drift away.

For me, anxiety always loses its grip when I acknowledge it rather than trying to suppress it. If I try to push it away or ignore it, it only comes back stronger. Instead, I catch it, acknowledge it, and let it go.

Breathwork – The Best Tool to Calm Anxiety Instantly:

Another tip that’s helped me so much is focusing on my breath. A great technique, especially when your mind is all over the place, is box breathing:

• Inhale for 4 seconds
• Hold for 4 seconds
• Exhale for 4 seconds
• Hold for 4 seconds

(Repeat at least 10 times, or until you feel calmer.)

Breathwork works because your brain can’t think of two things at the same time. So when you’re busy counting your breaths, your anxious thoughts take a backseat.

And if holding your breath feels too intense (which has happened to me before), just inhale for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, and keep counting. The key is rhythmic breathing, your body naturally starts to calm down when your breath is steady.

 

The Best Time to Meditate & Key Habits to Make It Easier

 

From my experience, the best time to meditate is first thing in the morning.

Why? Because your mind is the most receptive in the morning. After sleep, your brain is clear, and you usually don’t have a million thoughts racing yet. Meditation is way easier when your mind isn’t already overloaded.

Here’s what I recommend for beginners:

♡  Don’t check your phone first thing in the morning.

The second you open social media, you’re letting the outside world in before even checking in with yourself. Try to avoid your phone (especially social media )for at least an hour after waking up.

♡  Find a quiet place.

It doesn’t have to be a fancy setup, just somewhere you won’t be disturbed.

♡ Set a time & commit to it.

Even if it’s just 5 minutes a day, consistency is more important than duration.

♡  Start with guided meditations.

It makes the process way easier than sitting in silence wondering if you’re doing it right.

♡  Try to pair it with another habit.

For example, right after you drink your morning water or right before you make your coffee. That way, it becomes part of your routine.

At the end of the day, meditation isn’t about doing it perfectly. It’s just about showing up for yourself.

And the more you do, the more you’ll start to notice: You’re not as reactive. You’re calmer. You sleep better. You feel more you. And that’s when you realize—this isn’t just something you “should” do. It’s something that actually makes life better.

 

Final Thoughts

 

If there’s one thing I want you to take away from this, it’s this: – healing takes time.

I know how frustrating it can be to feel stuck in anxiety, to try something new and not see results right away, to wonder if you’re just one of those people who will always feel this way. But I promise you, you’re not broken. You’re not alone in this. And you can heal.

Meditation isn’t a magic pill. It won’t “fix” you overnight. But if you stick with it, even on the days when it feels pointless, even when your mind won’t shut up, it will change you.

And if you’ve tried before and given up? That’s okay. Start again. Start messy. Start small. Even just one minute a day of sitting in silence and noticing your breath is progress. Even just becoming aware of your anxious thoughts instead of letting them spiral is progress.

Healing doesn’t happen in one big moment, it happens in all the tiny moments when you decide to show up for yourself.

So, if you take anything from this, let it be this – give yourself a chance.

♡ You deserve to feel calm.

♡ You deserve to feel in control.

♡ You deserve to feel like you again.

And if you ever need someone to talk to, share your experience, or just feel less alone in this journey, reach out.

Send me a message, or let me know how your meditation practice is going.

You are so much stronger than your anxiety.